Ep. 25: When Compassion Prevails | Best Conduct

Once, a man came to the prophet (SAW) and requested some financial assistance. The prophet (SAW) gave him something and the man did not respond. He asked him, “Have I done good to you?” The man said, “You have not done good to me, nor have you been nice to me, either.” When the companions saw this, they became very upset and tensed up, and it looked like a few of them were going to approach him and have a word with him. The prophet (SAW) saw this and that someone might refute the man, so he said to him, “Why don’t you come over to my house?” He called the man over, and in his house, the prophet (SAW) gave him some more money. He then asked the man, “Have I been good to you now?” He said, “Yes, and may Allah (SWT) reward you on behalf of my family and my entire tribe.” The prophet (SAW) said, “When you came the first time, your response was different and now your response is something else. I suggest that you repeat in front of my companions what you have said now so that they know that everything is okay and that you are not upset.” He agreed, and the prophet (SAW) took the man outside of his house and to his companions and said, “This man came to my house and I gave him something else. Now, his statement changed, and I want you to hear this statement.” The man made du’a for the prophet (SAW) and thanked him. Then, the prophet (SAW) gave an example, saying, “My example with this man is like someone whose camel has suddenly escaped. The camel has escaped and everyone is looking for the camel. The more they chase after this camel, the further it runs and the further it moves away from the people. In its fear, it is no longer reachable. So, the man says, ‘Forget about the camel. Let me sort this out myself.’ When people back off, he goes and collects some food and he gradually convinces the camel to come back. Once the camel realizes that this man is his owner, he comes back and away they go. Similarly, if everyone jumps on a person and tries to correct their mistake, this will take someone further away, and if the person this individual has a connection with approaches them and uses a more compassionate approach, the problem is resolved.”

Through this example, the prophet (SAW) is teaching us to look beyond the moment. Sometimes, there are moments when people do things that are perhaps inappropriate; they might be rude to you and upset you, but the prophet (SAW) taught us to look beyond this, In this case, he was a follower of the prophet (SAW) and he looked after him and told the companions to leave him alone. What happens when someone says something that annoys us or disturbs us, right away, we write them off and burst out in anger or retaliation. This mentality where we get our friends together and intimidate the person was not the way of the prophet (SAW) and his companions, even though what the man had done was incorrect in terms of Iman. The prophet (SAW) did not allow the mentality of his followers to go take care of him. It was not like this. We also need to approach each other with more of an open heart, knowing that everyone can make mistakes. Sometimes, we will make a mistake, and sometimes, other people will make mistakes. This is just how life is. This is how people are, and the people who we will spend the rest of our lives with will also be like this. Sometimes, we will have to find a way to mend our affairs or problems and move on as if nothing happened. We should never create an environment where we are building an opposition against someone or creating an environment where someone is made to feel left out or the odd one out. This is not the Islamic approach to things and definitely not the approach that we should be using. May Allah (SWT) enable us to implement these beautiful teachings and enable us to walk on this path.